Wednesday, November 27, 2013


This time last year, I didn't feel that I had very much to be thankful for.  In fact, I spent a bit of time after Thanksgiving dinner, in my car, in my mother's driveway, crying.

This year, I still miss my Morgan and wish she was here with us.  But this year, I'm thankful for the gift of hope.  One week ago, we flew to Chicago for me to get a transabdominal cerclage (TAC).  Though I  am shuffling around with a sore belly, I now have real hope that I can carry a baby to term.  This is the first time I've felt this way in a year and a half.

While I'm laying in bed, with plenty of time to think, I wonder if I'm not being overly optimistic.  Shortly after we scheduled the surgery, I bought two little onesies, one pink, one blue, online.  And this weekend, I crocheted the sweetest little yellow baby sweater.  A little premature, but that's OK.  I like to think it's no different from the Pinterest board of baby items I started collecting before we even started trying the first time.  My perspective will likely ebb and flow over time, but to even think that I have a snowball's chance of a "normal" pregnancy is more than enough to be thankful for.